Smart Waiters & Dumb Burglars (How To Use Subtle Hints To Get Things Done)
By: Ankesh Kothari1. Smart Waiters Secret

Late at nights when business is slow, many restaurants adopt a “Sit Yourself” policy – where diners come and select their own tables.
This changes the whole ball game for waiters who make most of their money in tips. Because if a diner comes and selects to sit on another waiter’s table, all the other waiters working in the restaurant may have nothing to do but wait – and lose out on any tips for 30-60 minutes!
So here is what smart waiters do to make sure more people come and sit at their tables instead of their co-workers tables:
When they see someone approaching their door, they go to a table in their area and start wiping it with a towel. They then straighten the condiments and walk away briskly.
9 times out of 10 – the new diner will come and sit at their table – just because of their cleaning and setting up the table in front of their eyes!
2. Power Buy Buttons
Do you want to know an easy way to increase the number of sales on your website? Simply add the picture of the mouse pointer to your buy buttons!

Various split tests show that a buy button with the mouse pointer increases response rate by 18 to 45%!
Demonstrate to people where to click, and your click through rate will go up!
3. Burglar Proofing Your Home
Burglars love vacation time when people leave their homes and go on vacations. To prevent burglaries, you could buy fancy sophisticated alarm systems. But here are some extremely low cost ways that are almost as effective as the alarm systems:

1. Put a big dog dish and the largest bone you can find outside the front door. Put up a “Beware of Dog” sign too.
2. Setup a dummy camera next to the entrance of your house.
3. Don’t allow daily deliveries of mail, newspapers or fliers to build up when you are away. Ask the post office to hold your mail, or ask your friend or neighbor to take them regularly.
4. Invest in automatic timers to switch a few of the lights in your home on automatically during evenings.
Do these simple things so that the burglars don’t get the signal that your home is empty. And it’ll be 95% as effective in preventing burglaries as expensive alarm systems.
Action Summary:
- Show people that you are prepared.
- Give them appropriate cues and signals.
- And they’ll do as you want them to.
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The best place to hide your valuables is in the top shelf of your kitchen. Because statistics show that during 90% of the burglaries, the kitchen remains untouched!

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Hey how come you don’t use the mouse pointer for your promote this page and get paid buttons?
Good point Ami. The answer is – it slipped my mind when I created the buttons for this blog. I should get it rectified soon…
Thanks for keeping me on my toes
Great advice, as always! I wonder what the effectiveness is if you actually have a big dog?
Thanks Michelle
Thieves go after the weakest house. So if a house has a dog or seems like it has a dog – the burglars will leave that house alone.
The only problem in actually having a big dog is you’ll have to get someone to take care of them when you go out of town.
Wow, great post, as expected! These can certainly “provoke” people to do what YOU want. Thanks for another awesome post Ankesh.
Thanks Lucas for encouraging me with your kind words.
I enjoyed the part about the Power Buy Button so much I sent it to several of my friends.
Thanks,
Rod
Thank You so much Rod for referring this post to your friends
Hope the burglars don’t read this post.. Nice read with some though provoking insights.
I think when the burglars read the tagline of this blog (If you like reading what Britney Spears did today…) they will immediately exit the blog
Things always aren’t the way they should be, so you never know how your next step would open gates of fate for the others. I’m always paranoid before I leave on trip, leaving my house on alarm system’s security. Great tips here besides the good old alarm! Also getting into the habit of locking up windows and doors every time you leave the house may be of help also. All in all an informative piece.
Thanks Bharat for your comment and tips. Much appreciated.
How do you pick these examples!!!??? They illustrate your point so very well. I especially liked the idea of looking busy in front of the client.
About the dog, I have one and he sure discourages all kinds of unwanted callers. Even when he is out, people prefer to drop mail and bills with the security guard. So bullseye there as well!
Thanks Ally
I am lucky because I can remember stories a bit better than most others. So when I start out with a new topic, my mind builds parallels to stories I’ve heard automatically.
Ankesh,
As I wrote in my stumble review for this post, I always come away from this blog feeling smarter, well done sir!
In regard to your first example with the clean tables, I would also add that people want to feel like they are being responsible and making good choices. If you are clever enough to get someone to do what you want while making them think it was their own decision, you’ve won the ultimate victory. Many examples of this in diplomatic negotiations throughout history.
Thanks Cameron.
I’m glad that NonToxin is performing its goal: that of making people better thinkers
Simple observations in life make an average person smarter.
Its only NASA that needs to deal with rocket science, for the rest, theres non toxin:P
Thank You so much Lavin for your comment. Made my day!
This was actually pretty interesting, haha. This is the first post I’ve read on your blog but it’s pretty cool. I guess I gotta check everything else out now.
Thanks Corey for the comment. Hope you liked the other posts too…
Hi – I’m from 5000bc – have you any links to the research over the ‘buy now’ button?
Adele
Thanks for asking Adele. The conclusions of this post is based on my own in-home research done on my 14+ websites.
But here are some other 3rd party links of research done on buy now buttons that you may find helpful:
http://www.conversiondoctor.com/conversion-blog/2007/submit-button-usability-split-test-results-size-does-matter/
http://www.getelastic.com/cart-button-size/
http://blog.mindvalleylabs.com/what-does-your-order-button-say/599/
As the proprietress of a weekly coffee hour, I got sick of gathering up all the wet coffee stirrers, empty sugar packets, wadded up paper napkins, and other detritus that people leave in the most interesting places.
So the next time I set up, I put out large bowls labeled “Trash”.
No takers.
So the NEXT time I set up, I put out the same large bowls, did not label them, and instead put in each one a wet coffee stirrer, an empty sugar packet, and a wadded up paper napkin.
Worked like a charm.
MAN! I love the way you think, Ankesh! Much of what I’ve read from you is stuff I already know (the benefit of being really old), but might not have utilized or been able to explain to others. Your clean, direct, concise communication blows me away — THAT’S what effective communication is meant to be. Can’t wait to read through the rest of your site –