The Benefits of Baldness
By: Vikrant ChikhalClose your eyes and imagine the possibilities….imagine what will happen to your world, when the crowning glory on your head is gone forever! What will you do?…You are a bald man now. Open to all the elements. Bird excreta, drops on your clean pate like a hot bomb. There is no running from the forces of nature, or the digs of friends and strangers! Some individuals will take it in their stride, whilst others will run for cover (literally). All this for what?
Did you know that one of the first things that people stranded on an island stop caring about is their hair? Yes it’s true: we don’t comb our hair for ourselves. We do so because of our peers. But what happens when we start losing our hair?
Baldness is a world wide phenomenon. Every man experiences it sometime in their lives. But it’s not about losing hair; it’s about your attitude when you lose it!
Men who lose hair fall into 3 essential categories:
1. The Conformist
Homer Simpson – a Bald Conformist
The conformist is the bald man next door! He believes that he should save his hair till the last strand. So, the bald pate actually looks like a dish with noodles stuck around it. He always has a comb in his back pockets as a ready life-saver.
These are the guys who are stubborn and dislike changing their ways. They keep reminiscing about their past glory!
One of the most famous examples of this category is our very own Homer Simpson. Homer always shouts in a particular way, holds Bart’s neck and squeezes it with the exact intensity every time he has to punish him, makes the same goofy mistakes with Lisa and the makes the same babyish noises whilst talking to Maggie.
2. The Fence Sitter
Elton John – a Fence Sitting Bald
The second one is the Fence sitter. This man knows it all. Fake it till you make it is his motto in life. Hair today, gone tomorrow? No problem!. He spends lots of money to take care of his looks. He knows about what’s hot and what’s not! He does everything to maintain the status quo.
Reginald Dwight a.k.a Sir Elton John and Donald Trump are good examples. They crave peer acceptance and spend a lot of money in an attempt to look just right.
3. The Radical Bald
Seth Godin – a Radical Bald
The last one is the most exciting of them all. The radical! He is the guy who takes it all of and shows of his bald pate ( on purpose). Why, might you ask? To get noticed, of course!
The radical bucks peer pressure and realizes the several benefits of being bald.
3 Benefits of Going Bald
1. You save on haircuts. A good barber charges a good fee plus a hefty tip which leaves a small hole in the wallet. By becoming bald you save the fee and tip every month. If you put that money in stocks, you can reap the benefits of compound interest!
2. No hair or dandruff problems.
3. You can never forget a bald man; it’s that one essential thing that he doesn’t have that makes him noticeable.
Seth Godin, a well known blogger and marketer went bald to stand out from the crowd He always commands a second look wherever he goes. He always stands out in the crowd. When he talks people listen. They look at him with awe and admiration. He is not a stickler for norms and customs and always makes his own rules! This type of man is a natural leader, what people think be damned!
The radical bald is like the salmon, who goes upstream against all odds, does his thing and comes back a winner ( without getting affected by what the world thinks of him). Instead, the world actually becomes his follower.
Moral
To make a little play on words, you don’t have to be bald to stand out. But you do have to be bold. Don’t be a part of the herd mentality and follow boring conformist society rules. Make your own rules. Take your life in your own hands and lead the way!
“Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Subscribe to NonToxin RSS Feed
Follow NonToxin on Twitter
The Elton John before after pictures are very funny… Lolz
Yes, it sure is. It just shows to what extent the fence sitter will go to, to maintain the status quo of things!
Wow, what an inspiring post. Not that I’m gonna go bald, I just have to be bolder.
True, Lucas. It’s all about making the change from within. Once that is done, whether you are bald really doesn’t matter. You get bolder!
Its the solar panel for sex machine so go bald and get charged !!!
Now that’s something I didn’t know!
Theres only one successful person that is bald Lex Luthor and he dosent exist… and that apple guy.
I would beg to differ. Who is successful is really a relative term my friend. Who you would deem unsuccessful in a certain matter would be deemed successful in the same matter by others.
Mahatma Gandhi, Sardar Vallabh bhai Patel, among our freedom fighters, whereas the entertainment field has people like Ben Kinglsey, Elton John amongst so many more.
Be positive Mr. Bender, there are many more successful people who happenend to be bald, they don’t let that go to their heads ( literally) and act as an inferiority complex. So think positive!
That is a great quote from Emerson. I really like the sound of it, as I can imagine myself walking through a meadow following a trail, but wanting to choose a different, more scenic route. Good stuff.
Thank you for the gracious compliment Tage.
…guess that makes me a radical.
Nice reading it , not that it makes any difference to me.
:p
I think I’m going to shave my head again today… its just more freeing all-around
nice post… am bolder…. now am sure i wont go in for hair weaving
Positive thinking rocks